It's Been 4 Long Years

Today (March 9 in the Philippines) is our Grandpa's 4th death anniversary.  Yes, it's been four long years, yet it still feels like yesterday when he left us.  Inasmuch as it hurts to recall the day of his death, it's inevitable not to remember him all the time.  We still miss him just as much!  I miss his presence, I miss his voice, and above all, I miss Grandfather - everything about him!

It really is true that you never get over a death of a loved one.  You just learn to deal with the pain and longing as the days, months, and years go by.  If you ask me, I still don't think they're gone now.  Our Grandpa and Grandma are still with us.  In my heart, they'll always be there.

I never thought I'd start accepting the fact now that they're never coming back.  It hurts so much to think they're no longer with us, but it hurts more not being able to reach out to them and talk to them whenever I want to.  I miss the sound of their voice!  I miss how life was when they were still around!  Their presence brought so much joy and comfort to my heart regardless of the distance we had from each other.  Just knowing they were there, I've always felt I was home no matter where I was.

I'm trying my hardest not to cry right now.  But I think I'd feel much better if I let the emotions flow.  I know they would rather see me happy and not crying, but I think they will understand why I'm feeling sad right now.  I know in due time, this won't hurt as much anymore as it is hurting me right now.  As long as I know they're watching us from up above, my heart will always be at peace.

To you, Papi and Nana, we miss you so badly!  I know you know that I'd wish to hold you both in my arms right now, if only I could.  We will always love you!  We will always miss you!  Please, continue to watch over us.  And like what we always say, till we all meet again!